Fishkill Uvula Chili Korn

alienz

The NATO phonetic alphabetic (alpha, bravo, charlie, etc.) is used primarily by members of the military in order to communicate messages of great import clearly under adverse conditions. The original alphabet has gotten a bit threadbare due to its often haphazard inclusion in one too many war movies. As an alternative, I have put together the following.

ERA (emergency reptile alphabet)

A aspic

B bilbo

C chili

D dork

E eglantine

F fishkill

G gelid

H husk

I iskandar

J jerk

K korn

L lurch

M moist

N nodule

O oprah

P penis

Q quisp

R rascal

S slacks

T thor

U uvula

V vuvla

W whiffle

X xenon

Y yutz

Z zillow

 

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Ainadamar: Chapter Four

starry

This is the fourth chapter of my novel, “Ainadamar, or The Fountain of Tears: The First Flight of the Madrugada.” It details the adventures of a spaceship called the Madrugada, crewed by a Bulgarian space vampire, a lady barbarian, a 17th century French mountebank, a shape-shifting chef, a giant kitty, an empath, Morgan La Fey, an octopus surgeon, a cowboy, and the early 20th century Spanish Republican poet and martyr, Federico Garcia Lorca. I publish a new chapter each week. To read other chapters, click on the category Ainadamar.

Chapter Four

On Hiero Eridanus

They docked at a slip on Ring Eight, the big industrial wharf where the ships that needed repairs berthed. They had flown into the atmosphere over the Western Hemisphere of Eridanus at dawn, just when the turquoise sky was rough-plastered with whorls of salmon clouds. After docking and customs inspection, they all sat outside the ship on the catwalk, breathing real, if not pristine, air for the first time in several months. Only out under the clouds, above the city, did they realize how increasingly claustrophobic the Madrugada had become.

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Ainadamar: Chapter Three

bookpage2

This is the third chapter of my novel, “Ainadamar, or The Fountain of Tears: The First Flight of the Madrugada.” It details the adventures of a spaceship called the Madrugada, crewed by a Bulgarian space vampire, a lady barbarian, a 17th century French mountebank, a shape-shifting chef, a giant kitty, an empath, Morgan La Fey, an octopus surgeon, a cowboy, and the early 20th century Spanish Republican poet and martyr, Federico Garcia Lorca. I publish a new chapter each week. To read other chapters, click on the category Ainadamar.

Chapter Three

Into the Sculptor Void

Captain Stratsimir seemed to float up through the lid of his coffin, up to the ceiling of his personal quarters, through the decks of the Madrugada and into open space. He rose through stars, though events, cosmic and otherwise, some of which he recognized, like the Solar Fountains of the Bútscutin Confab and what momentarily appeared to be the bar at the San Francisco Press Club; others were unknown to him, a triple quasar that ran to the blue, a line of red giants, the engine room of a paddle-wheel streamer.

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Ainadamar: Chapter Two

spaceship

This is the second chapter of my novel, “Ainadamar, or The Fountain of Tears: The First Flight of the Madrugada.” It details the adventures of a spaceship called the Madrugada, crewed by a Bulgarian space vampire, a lady barbarian, a 17th century French mountebank, a shape-shifting chef, a giant kitty, an empath, Morgan La Fey, an octopus surgeon, a cowboy, and the early 20th century Spanish Republican poet and martyr, Federico Garcia Lorca. I publish a new chapter each week. To read other chapters, click on the category Ainadamar. 

Chapter Two

Earthward of the Curtain

 Captain Stratsimir lay in his coffin, arms crossed and eyes closed. He was stretched out at length on a sheet of blue silk, picked out in red-gold fleur-de-lis. The sheet kept the soil he lay upon separate from the clothing he lay in.

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Ainadamar: Chapter One

manolin

This is the first chapter of my novel, “Ainadamar, or The Fountain of Tears: The First Flight of the Madrugada.” It details the adventures of a spaceship called the Madrugada, crewed by a Bulgarian space vampire, a lady barbarian, a 17th century French mountebank, a shape-shifting chef, a giant kitty, an empath, Morgan La Fey, an octopus surgeon, a cowboy, and the early 20th century Spanish Republican poet and martyr, Federico Garcia Lorca. I publish a new chapter each week. To read other chapters, click on the category Ainadamar. 

Chapter One

Point of Origin

When the Madrugada popped through the film, it was into a storm of color. At first, the crew thought the chaos was the result of the slip. None had been through a slip that long before. In fact, no one at all had ever been through a slip that long before, so far as any of them knew.

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Ainadamar: Preface

Rocketship

This is the preface to my novel, “Ainadamar, or The Fountain of Tears: The First Flight of the Madrugada.” It details the adventures of a spaceship called the Madrugada, crewed by a Bulgarian space vampire, a lady barbarian, a 17th century French mountebank, a shape-shifting chef, a giant kitty, an empath, Morgan La Fey, an octopus surgeon, a cowboy, and the early 20th century Spanish Republican poet and martyr, Federico Garcia Lorca. I’ll publish a new chapter each week. To read them, click on the category Ainadamar.

Preface

Ayn al-Dam

Pablo de las Casas kneeled on the damp ground. He reached out and touched it with an open palm, then looked up to the Ayn al-Dam, the “fountain of tears.” The invaders had coarsened its name, like they had coarsened so many things, mispronouncing it Ainadamar. Its glassy music rang faintly in the near darkness. It too shall fail eventually, he thought.

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Indians are Not Our Problem (They’re Our Business Partners)

Sahalie Falls
Sahalie Falls

To the San Carlos Apache Nation of Arizona, Oak Flat is sacred land, the site of religious ceremony and a place where God speaks to the people. To the mining industry, Oak Flat is the promised land where copper speaks to the bottom line.

Thanks to the assistance of Sen. John McCain (R-AZ), Resolution Copper Mining, a subsidiary of the $51 billion Rio Tinto Corporation, has finally succeeded in getting special legislation passed that will allow them to mine there. The legislation was buried in the 2015 National Defense Authorization Act.

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Victorian Shakespeare

The Globe
The Globe

When I graduated from university I left with a sense of Victorian times as a desert in the history of Shakespeare productions. Shakespeare at that time, the common wisdom said, was a castrato, sweetened with the surgical removal of the writer’s nasty bits.

It was also an era, the thinking went, during which the words of the playwright were subjugated to a florid, almost choking ornamentation. The set decoration and costume design was vulgar, over the top. A Victorian Shakespearean production was overgrown with irrelevant visual distraction. Shakespeare, the cant went, was meant to be produced as Shakespeare himself produced it: bare bones.

In the intervening years, that belief that Shakespeare was to be stripped down was tested out. In smaller venues, with scrappy companies, his words were given rein. One production in particular comes to mind. The Shotgun Players in the San Francisco Bay Area produced Henry V.[1] The players were clad in all black, with colored sashes alone distinguishing their roles and a bare stage.

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This worm f/cks itself in the head and we should all probably just kill ourselves

oroborosThe worm has turned

Is there anything worse than humanity? Between the Charleston shootings, the rash of killings of unarmed men by law enforcement, and ISIS, our species has fewer and fewer unashamed apologists.

Surely humanity is the worst.

Until and unless of course you look at any other species. Then, holy crap, all bets are off. We start to look good and suddenly everyone remembers fish have yet to produce a Michelangelo.

You see, scientists have recently discovered Macrostotum hystrix, a worm so disgusting you’re liable to start thinking that even jazz fusion wasn’t so bad by comparison.

As Discovery News’s Jennifer Viegas put it, “One of the most unusual methods of reproduction has just been observed in a flatworm that uses its needle-like penis to stab itself in the head, which leads to egg fertilization.” And to existential horror, she neglects to add.

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